Lisa: head and neck cancer survivor Hi. I'm Lisa from Tampa, Florida. I'm a ten-year cancer survivor. I was first diagnosed, gosh, in 1989, and I had head and neck cancer, I had a tumor on my tongue, and that was removed and I had surgery and then about a year-and-a-half later, I had a recurrence on my neck. That time I had surgery and radiation. That was the more difficult part of the process, was the second surgery. I was working during the entire time I was having the radiation. One of the things I had to deal with was the work environment. Learning to talk with people about my illness. At that time, cancer was a death sentence, and a lot of people didn't understand what was going on. I felt like I had to do a lot of education of my coworkers and my boss, and I did lose a job or two, and I think because of the illness. But now, fortunately, things have changed quite a bit. You can be more open about it and talk with our bosses, I think, and that's a good thing. Educate yourself My advice for people, now I was young, I was 27 years old when I was diagnosed, so it really threw me for a loop. It was kind of like a three-year curve in my life, where I had to deal with a divorce, and losing, having cancer, and losing my job. So I advise people to get as much education as you can about your illness. If you can't do it, see if you can find an advocate who will do that for you, a sister, a brother, an uncle, whoever, somebody you trust. You're gonna have to deal with financial issues, along with your illness, so you really need as much support around you as you can find. My family was invaluable, but the big thing for me was finding folks about my age and had cancer, because there are so many issues when you're young and you're just starting out your career, and you get this information, you know. I got it over the phone, it was very strange, a lot of people don't have a good bedside manner. The doctor I had at the time was treating me like a five-year-old, basically, and ooh, that's a big word he used and I'm like, okay, I'm gonna go to a cancer center that specializes in this. But I ended up at a great hospital here in Tampa and they were very professional, very well equipped to deal with it, a good social work team and support people. I was encouraged to go to a young adult support group. My dad found out about it when I was in treatment the second time around, my family was kind of in denial about it the first time, we had a hard time dealing with it. But now I realize looking back it was probably tougher for them, feeling helpless, while I was dealing with this day to day, feeling nauseated, or feeling tired. They were really, now, what do we do? We have a 27-year-old in this family with cancer. So ---- the issue of dating and things like that, I was single at the time. The silver lining I did find my husband through the process, so that was like the shining light of this whole experience. He also had cancer and he's doing great now, so we educated our people. The benefit of this is to be able to bring awareness to others about the disease, and it's not a death sentence. I meet inspirational people through this who've had all kinds of cancers, and its' just amazing, it's so inspirational to talk with them and get their information. I mean, I'm talking about a lady who's had three types of cancer, and she keeps going, and she's 75 years old. And so, it's just incredible. It just changes your outlook on life, it really does. I feel like, I don't trust the small stuff anymore. You know, when my car breaks down, or I have a cold, it's no big deal. But I do get impatient with people who have this sometime. Okay. But it also helps me when I'm thinking, "Oh, I'm going through a tough time." Not really, because I survived cancer, I can do this. I can survive a job change or the various stressors that occur in the work place, and the thing that's help me is meditation, you know, or my faith in God, big thing. I know not everybody believes in God but I mean, prayer is just so important. My husband, Kevin, survived because of God, and that's what he's doing now, he is carrying out the mission that God gave him to do, because he was very, very close to death, and he's such a special person, I can't tell you, how much I love him. So, I was just, you know, you get all the help you can around you, and find somebody in your family who's good with finances, so they can deal with the life insurance company, or the house insurance. There's just so many issues that arrive, and you're not gonna be able to do it on your own. You're gonna have to say to yourself, you know, "I have to focus on getting better" and positive messages to yourself. And that's about it. The setbacks When I was first diagnosed it was April of 1989, and I was in a fairly new position, I was the editor of a newspaper, small weekly, and it was just such a shock. I can't even explain it. I got the news over the phone and that was like the furthest thing from my mind. I'd been having a problem with a tooth rubbing against my tongue and the sore was not going away, so it's so important to go to the right person. But I had been going to a dentist and he sent me on to an oral surgeon and he sent me on to an ear nose and throat guy, and that's where they made the diagnosis. However, they wanted to do all kinds of radiation, surgery, and it was just scaring the heck out of me. And of course, I'm thinking in the back of my mind about all the things I haven't done in my life yet. I'm 27 years old and I haven't had any children, I haven't won the Pulitzer Prize, I haven't written my book. There's still so many things I still wanted to do, and be with my family, of course. So that was all in the back of my mind. So I moved on from that but right after I got back from my surgery, about three weeks later I was called in by my boss, and given a bad review. And that was a shock to me. That was very, very difficult for me at the time, because I'd gotten good reviews, I'd worked for this company for three years, and it was very scary. After that, they gave me a little bit of time to improve, and quote unquote, and it wasn't enough for them, so by July I was let go. And it was really scary. I was told to leave in 45 minutes, I packed up my things and left the building and drove home, not even knowing where I was driving. You know, just drove home like a robot. Went home and cried for a long, you know, talked to my family, talked to my friends, the whole nine yards. There was a new recession in the newspaper business, and I ended up going into graphic arts. Not very happily, but you know, it was something to pay the bills. I ended up learning Pagemaker, which was a good experience, graphics program, things like that. So I did expand my knowledge, but at the time it just felt like a horrible thing. After that, I landed a job the following year. It is a temporary position and my boss at the time wasn't sure she wanted to hire me. So and then some budget cuts came through from the state, and they decided there wasn't anybody in those positions anyway, so I was let go from there, and within a week or two I had another job. I was like, I'm out of here now. Ended up doing Desktop Publishing again, at my next company, and that was when I got my, around that time I got my diagnosis. They were very kind to me at my next company, helped me out financially, it was a real blessing. But I was only there about ten months. I went through my radiation during that time. I worked about 7 hours a day. I had my radiation in the morning came to work, about 4:30 they told me to go home, I was exhausted. Went home and just you know, made my sandwich and fell into bed. That was about a month or so I had radiation. It seemed longer. It always does when you're going through that. Couldn't taste, you know, all the horrible things that happen when you're having your head and neck radiated. After that, I met my husband about that time, when I was finishing up the radiation, and went to the support group, and that was a godsend. Goodness, so many things happened in that short period of time. It was amazing. I went to do some other temporary positions. I was working to get back into newspapers, I really wanted to get back and I finally did, with the St. Pete Times, and that was a good thing. Worked there for about a year and a half and learned about a job so it did work out in the end, but at the time, you know, the small companies, I'm pretty sure they let me go because their insurance was gonna go up. That's just the way it is. Now I'm on a big state plan, so it doesn't matter so much. As far as dating, it's funny what you go through. A lot of people are afraid of you because you have cancer. They feel like it's catching, and they don't want to be around it. It's just funny what you run into. You find out who your friends are, too. That's for sure. People, it's kind of like when you get divorced, you know, and you don't see your friends that when you were married you used to see. Just changes your whole perspective. |
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